The world is a complex place, and the media’s influence in its representation and its power of communication and interpretation is a remarkable amplifier of emotions and illusions.
Tariq Ramadan

The media is among the most potent forces in shaping our thoughts, beliefs, and expectations, especially regarding love and relationships. From Hollywood movies to television dramas and social media influencers, the portrayal of love and money in marriage influences how we view these crucial aspects of life.

Now, let us see how media representations of relationships impact societal norms and individual expectations, especially regarding the balance between love and financial stability in marriage.

How Media Portrays Love and Money in Marriage

The “Fairy Tale” Love Story

The media has sold us the dream of a perfect love story for decades. Movies like Titanic, The Notebook, and even animated classics like Cinderella have ingrained the idea that love is magical and capable of overcoming any obstacle. In these tales, couples often triumph over class differences, family opposition, or life-threatening challenges.

While these stories are captivating, they rarely reflect the complexities of genuine relationships. Love is not just about passion or chemistry but also about effort, communication, and shared values. The lack of practical considerations like financial compatibility in these narratives often leaves people unprepared for the realities of marriage.

This romanticized depiction can create unrealistic expectations. People assume that everything else will fall into place as long as they are in love. Love alone may not pay the bills or resolve disagreements about money, parenting, or lifestyle choices. Recognizing this gap between fiction and reality is crucial for developing healthy relationship expectations.

The Rise of Glamorous Wealth in Love Stories

The media has also glamorized wealth as an essential ingredient in relationships. Films like Crazy Rich Asians and shows like Gossip Girl showcase a world where love and luxury go hand in hand. Characters often woo their partners with grand gestures—diamond rings, private jets, and lavish weddings—presenting wealth as a cornerstone of romantic success.

This portrayal subtly suggests that financial success is desirable and necessary for love to flourish. While there’s nothing wrong with enjoying financial stability, these exaggerated depictions can lead people to associate love with material possessions. It can also pressure individuals to delay marriage until they reach certain financial milestones or prioritize partners based on their earning potential.

Healthy relationships are built on mutual respect, emotional support, and shared goals—not extravagant gifts or high net worth.

Social Media and the “Perfect Couple” Illusion

Social media has taken the glamorization of relationships to a new level. Platforms like Instagram and TikTok are filled with pictures of “perfect” couples: exotic vacations, surprise proposals, and expensive gifts. These curated moments create an illusion of flawless relationships where love is measured in likes and shares.

However, what’s often missing is the reality behind those glossy posts. Financial struggles, arguments, or the hard work required to maintain a relationship rarely make it to the feed. This selective portrayal can lead to feelings of inadequacy among those whose relationships don’t appear as glamorous. It can also push people to prioritize appearance over authenticity, striving to emulate a fantasy rather than building genuine connections.

To counter this, individuals must remember that social media represents highlights, not the whole story. Love cannot be captured in a single post or compared to someone else’s curated reality.

The Impact on Societal Norms

Changing Definitions of Success in Marriage

Historically, success in marriage was defined by emotional fulfillment, companionship, and family building. However, modern media has shifted this narrative. Today, success is often associated with material achievements—owning a home, maintaining a dual-income household, or achieving a certain social status.

This shift is particularly evident in reality TV shows like Keeping Up with the Kardashians, where wealth and love are intertwined. Couples are often judged by their ability to achieve these milestones rather than their emotional connection or shared values.

While financial stability is essential, equating it with marriage success can lead to misplaced priorities. A successful relationship balances emotional intimacy with practical considerations like financial planning and shared responsibilities.

The Pressure to Conform

Media creates societal pressure for couples to conform to idealized standards. For example, the “dream wedding” concept popularized by movies and social media can push couples to spend beyond their means. Similarly, the expectation of achieving financial milestones before marriage can delay or discourage commitment altogether.

These pressures often lead to anxiety and dissatisfaction, as individuals feel they must meet these benchmarks to have a “valid” relationship. In truth, every couple’s journey is unique, and success cannot be measured by societal standards alone.

Reinforcement of Gender Roles

Media often reinforces traditional gender roles, where men are expected to be providers, and women are portrayed as caretakers or gold diggers. This perpetuates stereotypes that can harm both genders, limiting the scope of what a modern, equitable partnership can look like.

The Psychological Effects of Media Portrayals

Unrealistic Expectations

The media’s portrayal of relationships often paints an unrealistic picture of marriage. Movie characters rarely argue about issues like splitting household chores or paying bills. Instead, their lives are filled with grand romantic gestures and effortless passion.

When people internalize these portrayals, they may enter relationships expecting constant excitement and perfection. This can lead to disappointment when faced with the inevitable challenges of real-life partnerships. Recognizing that love requires effort, compromise, and patience is essential for building lasting relationships.

Comparisons and Relationship Insecurity

Social media has amplified the human tendency to compare ourselves to others. Seeing friends or influencers flaunt online relationships can make people question their partnerships. Why doesn’t my partner surprise me with lavish gifts? Why don’t we travel as often?

These comparisons can breed insecurity, leading to dissatisfaction and even resentment. However, it’s important to remember that every relationship is unique, and what works for one couple may not work for another. Focusing on your values and needs is far more rewarding than striving to meet someone else’s standards.

Materialism Over Emotional Connection

When the media excessively emphasizes material success in relationships, it can overshadow the importance of emotional connection. Couples may focus more on achieving financial goals than nurturing their bond, leading to a shallow partnership.

While financial stability is crucial, it should complement, not replace, emotional intimacy. A strong relationship thrives on trust, communication, and mutual support—qualities that money alone cannot buy.

Love vs. Money: A Tug-of-War in Media Narratives

The Romantic Ideal

Stories that focus on love often portray it as selfless and sacrificial. Think of classic tales where lovers give up everything for each other, such as Romeo and Juliet. These narratives emphasize that love is worth any price, sometimes overlooking the importance of financial stability.

The Materialist Dream

On the other hand, the media often glorifies relationships in which wealth plays a central role. Characters in such stories are celebrated for their opulence and social standing, implying that financial gain is an essential component of happiness in marriage.

Striking a Balance Between Love and Money

Love versus money often feels like a tug-of-war in media narratives. Romantic stories glorify selfless love, while tales of financial success highlight the importance of wealth in relationships.

In reality, the healthiest relationships balance love and financial compatibility. Love provides emotional fulfillment, while financial compatibility ensures practical stability. Couples who successfully navigate this balance are more likely to build lasting partnerships.

Media’s Influence on Individual Expectations

The Pursuit of the “Perfect” Partner

Many people develop rigid ideals about their future partners thanks to media portrayals. They may look for someone who embodies romantic passion and financial security, even when such perfection is rare.

Delayed Marriages and High Standards

Some individuals delay marriage because they feel they haven’t achieved the financial milestones glorified in the media, such as owning a house or earning a six-figure salary. This trend is particularly evident in urban areas with higher exposure to Western media.

The Role of Family and Culture

While media has a significant impact, family and cultural values still play a critical role in shaping marriage decisions in places like Nigeria. Parents often encourage marrying for financial stability, even if the media promotes the idea of romantic love.

How to Navigate Media’s Influence on Relationships

1. Separate Reality from Fiction

Understanding that media portrays idealized relationships can help people avoid unrealistic expectations. Real-life relationships are messy, require compromise, and rarely resemble the polished images seen online or on screen.

2. Focus on Communication

Couples should prioritize open conversations about their needs, expectations, and values. Discussing finances early on can help build trust and create a solid foundation.

3. Embrace Financial Literacy

Financial compatibility is essential for long-term relationship success. Couples should work together to set goals, budget, and plan for their future rather than relying on media-driven fantasies of wealth.

4. Limit Social Media Comparison

Taking breaks from social media or following accounts that promote healthy, realistic relationships can reduce feelings of inadequacy and insecurity.

5. Seek Role Models Beyond Media

Instead of looking to celebrities or influencers, find inspiration in real-life couples who balance love and financial stability meaningfully.

The Road Ahead: Media Responsibility in Relationship Portrayals

Promoting Healthy Relationships Through Media

Media creators have the power to shape perceptions of love and money positively. Portraying relationships that equally value emotional connection and financial responsibility can inspire viewers to build more balanced partnerships.

Moreover, challenging stereotypes and showcasing diverse narratives can help break down harmful norms. Stories highlighting teamwork, compromise, and shared goals can be valuable examples for real-life couples.

Challenging Stereotypes

Media creators should challenge traditional gender roles and materialistic ideals by portraying equitable partnerships where love and financial stability are valued.

Representation Matters

Including stories from different cultures, socio-economic backgrounds, and perspectives can create a more nuanced understanding of relationships.

Conclusion: Finding the Balance Between Love and Money

The media significantly shapes perceptions of love and money in marriage, influencing societal norms and individual expectations. While romantic ideals and financial aspirations are natural, it’s crucial to strike a balance between the two.

By understanding the impact of media portrayals and focusing on open communication, financial literacy, and realistic expectations, couples can build lasting relationships that thrive on mutual respect and shared goals.

Ultimately, love and money should complement each other, creating an emotionally fulfilling and financially stable partnership.